In 2015 my life really started to head downhill. My drinking and drug use was completely out of control. I was let go from a job. I had essentially been living that entire year out of a duffel bag. The things that should have mattered most simply didn’t. I will spare you the long story of how I got to Second Chance Recovery. Like many people before me I arrived there broken, a shell of my former self.
By early 2016 my family life had come to a crossroads and the few things I had left were disappearing. I had to be let go from a job because of where alcohol had taken me. After spending the first several months of 2016 in a blackout state I had a brief period where I began to make plans to go to rehab.
To the best of my recollection my last drink of 2016 was in my parents garage. During a 30 hour period I nearly drank every last drop of alcohol they had. This was the first time they had truly seen the carnage my alcoholism was capable of causing. They woke up in the morning to a caged animal in their home. Cigarette smoke filled the air. Wine bottle after wine bottle. Beer after beer. Cider after cider. To oblivion. Beside themselves, there was no other alternative, they had the police take me away. Oddly enough, being taken away in handcuffs had become normal.
When I returned to my parents house the next day what little belongings I had were outside. That night, I slept outside my parents home. It was the end of May 2016. I expected my EI deposit over the course of that night. I said to people in the hours preceding this that I was leaving. Heading to a treatment center. Truthfully? My intention was to leave Campbell River. Leave Vancouver Island. Die.
The money never went in to my bank account, of all the days for this to happen, when I was ready to truly say “F*** it!” There was definitely some divine intervention transpiring. When my parents opened the door that morning, I was given choices again. “Either you get off our property or we take you right now to see a Crisis Nurse.”
We didn’t say a word to each other. Inevitably, they brought me to the front door of Second Chance Recovery. I couldn’t bring myself to thank them or say “I love you” at that time. My pride still gripped me. Ego drove me. But in I went. Terrified. I was sober. Courageous. I stayed for 28 days. During this experience I strung together the first real sobriety I had lived in 15 years.
It’s amazing when you have an open mind and the willingness to begin a journey to change. What I learned during my time at Second Chance is that this isn’t something I can do on my own. I’ve always had that tendency to isolate. I couldn’t do that at Second Chance. Structure began being restored. I equate the house to a bubble. It’s an opportunity to take a time out. When I had absolutely nowhere left to go, I had Second Chance.
I imagine there are a lot of people nearly at their breaking point every day. Fathers, Mothers, Daughters, Sons. I could go on and on. One person’s addiction directly impacts 10 people. From there it continues to multiply. From a numbers standpoint the volume of lives that have been touched by Second Chance are overwhelming. If you’re struggling, reach out. That is courage. That is bravery.
I can’t believe how quickly I thought I had things figured out. I was never going to drink again. I thought I had recovery. Well, I didn’t. At that time I had sobriety. There is a fundamental difference. Sobriety has a shelf life. Recovery is constant. Ever evolving. Fresh. It takes work.
In 2017 I began drinking again. The foundation that started with Second Chance began to crack. I wasn’t practicing what I had learned. I spent another eight months completely unraveling all the work I had put in. In March of 2018 I returned to detox. The amazing thing this time was I didn’t have any hesitation. I carried no shame walking through those doors. That open mind and willingness returned. I’d had enough and knew if I carried on I would die.
To say Second Chance played a huge part in who I am today would be an understatement. The support there is amazing. I felt like I was home. That place saves lives. The message is the same and for some people like myself it takes a few visits to begin to receive that message.
PTSD, depression, anxiety and a whole host of other mental health challenges present themselves to people every single day. A lot of us use mind altering substances to cope with our lives. Over time these coping mechanisms altered who I was. I am not that person today. I have a network of people who are part of my life. Second Chance is part of that network too.
I’d do whatever it takes to convey to everyone the importance of Second Chance. Campbell River is a beautiful place. Wouldn’t you agree that it should also be a great place to start a journey to recovery?